ex sub in need

I had a difficult ending to a relationship with a sub a few months back. When he was my boy I was soooooo happy. I had a key to his house and I would do inspections to make sure he made his bed, had groceries, did his laundry, and even dealt with his landlord. I took him to the doctors and made sure he took his meds(including counting his pills) and ordered certain food he had to eat so mommy was satified. Yes it was mommy play and I helped save him. I even had a say about his dates...if he was alowed to have sex or not. I also had a bedroom/paint studio in his house and my own groceries and would tuck him into bed and stay with him incase he had nightmares.

What went wrong is I got a little too involved. I told him all the time this was temporay as he was too young for me but he insisted for me not to worry about that. I made the mistake allowing him to take me on dates, which he was very generous. Then the sleep overs got very emotional as he would hold me all night and he wanted me to stay over more and more as he slept better when I was there. I developed feelings outside the Domme/sub relationship... and it lead to a horrible breakup.

He lied to me about what he was doing with others. He said he did it because he didnt want to lose me. I told him it was fine if he wanted a real GF, but it was the lies I could deal with. I broke it off pretty dramically and took all my stuff out of the house and gave back his key. We had hurt each other big time and it took 4 months before we uttered a word to each other.

So now he is off his meds and I have been asked to step back in as a caretaker yet again. I cant allow any emotional attachments again as I am not going to fall for the same shit. But I care for him, he had a very abusive past and I understand his issues... plus I know I can make him healthy again. I like taking care of people and he is very sweet when he is good.

I want to help, but at arms length. I am way too good at my mommy play and I am honored by the request... even though I shouldnt. My heart is set on my AF guy big time and I cant screw that one up. I am sure I will not take on my young sub boy again, I think that will be a big NO...but I can still be a friend.